User blog:DeviousPeep/''Devious Maids'' Character Ranking
Hi, Divina Peep here, and I'm gonna rank the main and supporting characters of Devious Maids. Why? Because I fucking can! Since Rena did it, I gotta do it too. I prolly won't finish it but I'm bored, it's 2am, I want something to do. This list is based on how good I think these people are as characters, not by how I truly rank them. So let's get dis shit started. 33. Carter & Jason I will start out with the two most useless characters who have ever appeared in DM - Carter and Jason. I have mixed feelings towards these two. I like that they were actually introduced as characters (like Little John and Friar Tuck) and not just extras like 2x01 and 2x02. Yes, they weren't really necessary, but it didn't hurt to have them. Also, Jason is fucking hot. What I hate about these two is one, Carter, a nobody, killed off this series' most notable supporting character. Like, what the fuck?!?! It should've been Ethan, an actual series regular, or Ty, the season's big bad (was he the big bad? Idk.) Carter killing Alejandro was just retarded. Another thing I hated about these two was how real they seemed, but how fake it made it look (if that makes sense.) Like when Jason asked Ty or Carter if he was high, I thought that seemed like something someone would say irl, but that it made it seem so fake. I can't really explain it. Their conversations were all just sooo ugh. I just don't like it, ok? Obviously these two deserved to be last anyway. They don't even deserve to be supporting characters, they were played by extras for two episodes and their actors are minor. 32. Tucker Westmore He was such an adorable baby, so easily likable, just perfect. But he's a prop. He's nothing. He's just a baby. All he does is sit there and look pretty. I had little feelings for Tucker in season one since he was just there. Then season 2 comes along, Peri takes him to Europe, and it's bye bye baby. Then they bring him back and he's this ugly two year old. If I remember correctly, everyone else loved it. That devious smile. I just hated it. Couldn't get past how ugly he got. I'm sorry but he was so cute in season 1 and then they recast him with that thing. Then he misses the fucking finale. Way to go, DM. 31. Remi Delatour First mainie, yay. Lol he sucks so much. Originally I had him ranked under Tucker. Both of them are just pretty faces who are there to be there, but Tucker's excuse is that he is a baby. What's Remi's? Nothing. He has no excuse. He was in 9/13 episodes in season 1, which is almost worse than Sam (lol Sam's above him...), and then his season 2 appearances are just pathetic. He's just such a waste of space that is probably endgame. He's such a prop, his appearances are usually unnecessary anyway, he's just so bad. The only reason he's ranked above Tucker is because he is so damn hot, he's main, and Tucker got ugly. Hi. 30. Pablo Diaz There is a special place in hell for this miserable piece of horse shit. He started out in first season as the nice, funny, small-penis husband of Zoila. He only appeared in three episodes of the first season, so there wasn't much character to him. I, along with everyone else liked him. Then season 2 comes along and the fucktard leaves Zoila. I hated Zoila at the time, so I didn't sympathize with her at all. I just laughed cuz I'm that evil. Then later on he comes back, wanting Zoila's forgiveness after walking out and says that he left his girlfriend and all that. I wanted Zoila to chose him, omg I shipped it so much. At that point I think everyone hated him, but no, I still liked him and wanted Zoila to chose him over Javier. I mean c'mon, they had over 20 years of marriage and a daughter together. Then the finale comes along and we find out Helen kicked out Pablo and he only came back to Zoila because he had no where to go. DM absolutely ruined him. He went from being one of my favorite supporting characters to the second worst character in the whole show (yah die Reggie). Then he's at Rosie's wedding and Zoila finds out she may be carrying his baby inside of her and then Ty comes by shooting and he is hopefully shot and killed. So yeah, go slice ur wrists and drink bleach u piece of shit. OH AND HE BACKED OUT OF GIVING GENEVIEVE A KIDNEY!!! HE WAS A MATCH AND SHE'S DYING AND THEN HE JUST BACKS OUT LIKE OMFG U STUPID BITCH UR GONNA JUST LET HER DIE JUST UGHHHH!!!!! 29. Sebastian Hi he's hot and he's gonna be main season 3 so yay. Um he fucked Carmen, causing me to lose all hope of Carmen and Sam ever getting back together. I like him tho and can't wait for his story. Seems good enough. Good night Joe x 28. Miguel Falta Omg I love this kid. He just makes the show so perfect, so complete, it just wouldn't be the same without him. He had been mentioned all throughout the first season and had a brief cameo in 101, but wasn't properly introduced until the second to last episode of the first season. Yah he kinda sucked. Peri was so racist, making him do stuff for her. Lol if Miguel didn't get Peri her damn phone then Rosie wouldn't have gotten deported. Well, not entirely true, but just, JUST EVERYONE FUCK OFF, OK?? Miguel sucked throughout season 2. It wasn't until 212 happened that he became the best child character ever. That scene with Rosie about Reggie and handing her the sword, my eyes were watering, it was just so perfect. Then Miguel was there for when Spence proposed and omg I just love that little white trash, disease-infested Mexican. <3 27. Eddie Suarez Eddie is really, really boring like all he did was sit in jail for 13 eps and barely became supporting. He was important and everything but I didn't give two shits about him. He wasn't a bad character, but he wasn't a good character. He was there for a reason, he served his purpose, so that's that. However, I am upset that he didn't return in season 2 and tell his mommy that she shouldn't be with Nick or something. At least he was mentioned in 201 and maybe another ep. Yah. His story with Flora was aight from what I remember. Season 1 aired so long ago and I haven't seen so many of those episodes in months. Sorry if I forgot anything, but um, this is it I guess. Oh and he's ugly. 26. Michael Stappord Okay, so I don't really remember much of what he did, which I believe to be nothing. I just remember Michael as Marisol's boring boss in season 1 who was married to the beautiful Brianna Brown and formerly married to Alma Hodge. He was such a boring main and only appeared in 9/13 episodes. He was nice and all, but really what else was there to him? I'm not disappointed in him since he served his purpose, he had connections with the Powell's which wasn't bad, and we all enjoyed his story with Alma Hodge 2.0 even though she didn't die like what we all hoped for. He told Marisol everything about Philippe murdering Flora which didn't really amount to anything since the dumb whore maid still couldn't get a confession. Oh well. Anyway, yeah, Michael's okay. I'm sure you all understand why he was ranked so low. Yay that he and Taylor get their happy ending though. Bai. Category:Blog posts